OK so this is it – after reading Gretchen Rubin’s Happiness Project I have been vaguely aware that when I am doing or thinking certain things I am not doing myself any favours. I think I finally have to acknowledge that starting my own ‘Happiness Project’ (and logging the journey on my blog) is the way forward. It will allow me to work out some key strategies and hopefully it will be a little bit insightful or inspiring to others too.
Today I was reading through some other bloggers’ posts and considering what it is I like about my favourite blogs and it occurred to me that I tend to have about four standard reactions to what I see/read:
- OMG this woman is quite literally a domestic goddess – LET ME SWAP LIVES/BLOGS right NOW!
- This is beautiful work but I know that the person writing is not on the same wavelength as me and therefore I may never consider becoming a follower.
- I am feeling informed/engaged/entertained/tickled pink, this content has totally hit my wavelength and the person writing clearly doesn’t know how good they are.
- I am feeling entertained/tickled but so are about 10,000 other people and I don’t feel like I can engage because my voice is being drowned out by everyone else’s and how can we respect each other when you will never have time to engage with me?
Perhaps it could be said that the whole experience is a bit like dating…
I’m always comparing upwards and perhaps feeling that my blog is not good enough, not pretty enough, too wordy or some other such nonsense, and that my children are not doing worthy enough projects or coming out with cute enough ‘kiddisms’ but today I had a revelation worthy of Gretchen Rubin (who I shall forewith refer to as The Rubemeister) – I do what I do – which is write, in as engaging a manner as I can possibly manage whilst a 19 month old lobs bits of half chewed sandwich down my cleavage.
My home will never be up to show home standards, I will never crochet an elephant (errr, I’m not sure that is one of my goals actually), I will probably never figure out how to whip up a viral frenzy by riffing on my toddler’s toilet habits or start an Etsy business from home, or write a novel or win a MAD Blogging Award (or even get a nomination! Maybe I should ask – you don’t ask you don’t get…) But the Rubemeister is right – sometimes you have to just let go and accept that every single aspiration that ever pops into your head is not necessarily going to ‘take’. Its a grieving process the letting go – a bit like the day you put your favourite pet in a shoebox, buried it under the cherry tree and wrote a (bad) ode to the beautiful kinky tail never to be seen again (sob!) but at least its closure.
It’s also a chance to reassess what it is you actually do do well, what you are good at, the things that you can actually have a stab at as well as an acknowledgement that you actually quite like your higgledy piggledy bookshelves, colourful piles of toys, nutty little boys, organised chaos and eclectic knowledge of film and literature as well as a photographic memory for all 50 US states (don’t ask – seemed like a good idea at the time…)
All this letting go and embracing is actually quite liberating – I urge you to give it a try…oh and if you fancy it, nominate me for Mad Blogging Awards Best New Blog!